Abundant Blessings-On Cloud Nine

I've been caught up in all the bad stuff in the past couple of weeks. But, since the bad has subsided, I'm seeing all the blessings God has given me that I didn't really see or realize before.

1) I got a job! Sure, I knew I got a job, but I didn't see it as a blessing. The first full week I worked was crazy busy, and I saw it as a bad thing. But, I got my first pay check last Thursday, and boy was it amazing! I had money to save for stuff. I had money to pay for my Joyce. I had money to support my friends. I didn't realize how independent and "grown up", for lack of a better phrase, I'd feel because of it. I've always wanted to feel like I earn things, and now, I do. I fully support Joyce. On my own. No help. Just me. And, I can now physically show my friends how much I care about them when things are bad. People don't usually show me love in the way that I can see it, so I put everything I have into each one of my friends to show them I much they mean to me.

2) The relationship I've been longing to have with my mother is actually forming. She bought me a fish last week, and it seems stupid, but since then, I've had feelings for her. Before, I could cared less about her. She and I fought constantly, never saw eye to eye, and lived extremely separate lives. We'd only talk if we needed something from the other person. Lately, we've been getting along amazingly, and we actually talk! I don't trust her enough to tell her my personal things, but we talk more than we ever have. I'm actually looking forward to the future because I know we're going to be together as mother and daughter instead of anything else. Just thinking about the love I've felt from her these past couple of weeks is really overwhelming. It makes me cry. I've never ever felt love from her, let alone the amount I'm getting from her now. I really hope this doesn't change. I can honestly say I love my mom now. Honestly, truly, and with meaning.

3) One of my cross country girls is coming home from Miami University the 18th, and she's coming to visit me at school!! I haven't seen her in a year, and since my freshman cross season, she and I have been getting closer. Also, because my mom and I used to be distant, I'd always look to older girls for the love I lacked from my mom. And, she was one of those girls who I look up to. It has meant the world to me getting to know her and growing closer to her. She has showed me love in a way I could feel it. Talking to her on facebook and on the phone has meant a ton because it shows me she cares about me, and that's what I long for. I long for people to care about me. I don't usually feel like many people do. So, this visit means more now than anything. And, to know she's coming just for me makes me feel loved. I'm so incredibly stoked!

4) The first thing I do when say my night prayers is thank God for absolutely everything and everyone I have in my life. Recently, I can't help but thank Him for giving me 6 specific people that I work with. Already, they are treating me like family. It's only my third week working, but I've become comfortable and am no longer shy around them. Last night, it was me and Elizabeth working. She's in my Spanish class, and in the beginning of the year, I wasn't really sure about her. I judged when I really shouldn't have. And, I'm ashamed I did because she's a really good person and is becoming one of my good friends. Also, I love Kenny, Trina, Kayla, Garrett, and Taylor S. They are the other amazing people I work with. And, I love them!

5) The one thing that isn't going too well right now is that I'm really sick. But, the good thing is that it came a week and a half before our first treb performance. I would've been dead if it came any later. Hobbs would've been off with me head..... no joke. Hopefully it'll go away by then.

6) My friend who I don't see often seems to be getting better. Or at least, that's how God's making me feel. I feel as though a weight has been lifted whenever I think of her. It's a relief, yes, but it makes me happy that she's seeming happier. I continue to pray for her, but God's plans for her are taking place, and I'm feeling them, whether she is, too, or not.

7) I saved the absolute best for last!!!!!!!! TONY'S COMING HOME!!! AND HE'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS!!! I listen to the wlit all the time. A couple nights ago, there was this mother who was sad her daughter was going into the navy and wouldn't be home for Christmas and her son who is going to join soon, also. It made me realize how blessed I am that Tony is coming home this year for Christmas! He was home last year, too, but he left 3 days before Christmas and 6 days before my first surgery. I cannot express how happy and relieved and thankful and EXCITED I am that he's coming home!!! It's finally my turn to have my big brother home to celebrate this wonderful holiday! I had to go without last year, and it was thee hardest thing I had ever done. I missed him like crazy, and all I did was cry. It was a rough Christmas. But, this year is going to be AMAZING! And a bonus! He'll be home for my birthday!!! WOOOOO! I'm counting down the days until he's here, and it's 16!

I pray that God may bless everyone like He is me. I feel closer to God now more than I ever have. It was because of my rough patch a few weeks ago that I'm feeling like this. But, it had to happen because I was slipping away from Him. I needed to go through that so that I could cry out to Him.

I love my God more than anything!!!! He gives me hope, faith, and happiness. I hope He does the same for you!